I'm excited for my supervisor!! He told me tonight that he's going to be a daddy (again)!!! His girlfriend (soon to be fiancee- maybe?) is about 5 weeks pregnant.
But, just like I, he's not looking forward to telling the Flight Chief about it. I already told him that he's probably going to get the fake happy congratulations, now I am going to talk about it behind your back with people who have no business knowing. Ugh...
I hate my flight chief and his stupid little click!
/sigh.
Soraya is doing pretty well in daycare! Mrs. Mary says that she said "Hi Katie" when the cleaning lady came in and "Bye Katie" when she left. I'm pretty proud.
When I brought her to day care on Wednesday morning, I sat down with her while she was eating breakfast she looked at the posters behind where she was sitting and said "Ellison" "Derrick" and "Tyler" when I pointed at the one for each child.
Then I played with Sophia. She's such a cutie. There are only 3 girls in her class, and I think Ellison is moving up really soon :(
I love that *knock on wood* there are no hitters or biters in her class. I admit I am kind of scared to have her move up into the 2's class. Luckily for me it will not be until August.
However, if we have another baby, then we will be pulling Soraya from the CDC and having the wife of a guy I work with watch them. But the earliest that will happen is January of 2013 (meaning I would have to get knocked up this cycle). But I really don't foresee that happening.
So speaking of work.. (I know, I know) There is a reception ceremony for the family of Travis Griffin who was a trainer when I was stationed here in '05. He was killed four years ago tomorrow, and my flight chief is being a douche and won't let me go to anything that has to do with the ceremony... Not the reception, or the Vigil run or the street dedication ceremony. It really makes me mad that people who knew him are getting pushed aside. I'm mad that my leadership didn't push hard enough to make sure I'd be able to go. I even specifically asked the Lt. Two almost three weeks before the ceremony if he would ask Mids 2 if there was anyone willing to work for the ones who wanted to go.
*SCREAM* I HATE MY LEADERSHIP!!!!
Whew... now that that is out of the way... I think I am done for tonight.
Until next time... <3
Monday, April 2, 2012
Saturday, March 24, 2012
Monday, March 19, 2012
Charles knows, but does not seem worried at all... Or If he is he's not showing it. I am going to take a test on Wednesday when I wake up, if Aunt Flo doesn't show up.
I am trying so hard not to stress, but it is so hard.
If I am I have to go to the doctors A.S.A.P. and get all the crap started, but I don't want to tell my leadership again.
I don't want to hear the comments. I know what they are going to say, and I know they are going to talk about me behind my back. I know they do, I've been told by a reliable source.
Really there are only two other NCO's on my flight I can trust. Now, you may ask why can't you trust the others?
Here's why: They are a part of a "click" that includes all but three NCOs, and they have their secret meetings which deliberately leaves those three NCO's out. I can't trust them to keep my problems/issues on a need to know basis.
Did I mention that no less than three hours after I told only two people I was pregnant, and I wanted to keep it on the "down low" (for right now anyways) the whole flight pretty much knew.
Really, Guys!?!
Oh wait I get it, my business is the flight's business!! Is that how it goes?
/sigh.
I was hurt that, despite specifically asking this person not to say anything, he said something. I know who it was because at that point only two people knew and one was my supervisor.
Looks like my plan of action is to only let my supervisor know what is going on.
Anyways on to something else....
I am getting my butt whopped in Words with Friends. I am I am playing my aunt Gail and in the last few game the scores have been like 388-123.
Right now, the scores are not too bad 112-94, 199-139 and 96-89.
We are starting a business, from home and I need pick a niche of items to sell. Charles is going to be selling boxing items that other places (shoes and stuff) do not carry.
The coach said that if you go on GoogleAdwords and use the keyword tool, you can find out how much traffic a certain niche gets. He said that over 2,000 hits is good, but you don't want to be too broad though.
/sigh I do not have a clue what I want to sell.
Oh. In six more months (2 cycles) I will be eligible for orders overseas... Whoop! Not that I think I will get them. It would be nice to get to see more places. I can't remember what is exactly on my list, but I know Mildenhall, United Kingdom and Kadena,Japan were both on my preference sheet this last time when the listing came out.
Well,I am pretty hungry, so I'm going to say goodbye for now.
<3 Love you all! <3
I am trying so hard not to stress, but it is so hard.
If I am I have to go to the doctors A.S.A.P. and get all the crap started, but I don't want to tell my leadership again.
I don't want to hear the comments. I know what they are going to say, and I know they are going to talk about me behind my back. I know they do, I've been told by a reliable source.
Really there are only two other NCO's on my flight I can trust. Now, you may ask why can't you trust the others?
Here's why: They are a part of a "click" that includes all but three NCOs, and they have their secret meetings which deliberately leaves those three NCO's out. I can't trust them to keep my problems/issues on a need to know basis.
Did I mention that no less than three hours after I told only two people I was pregnant, and I wanted to keep it on the "down low" (for right now anyways) the whole flight pretty much knew.
Really, Guys!?!
Oh wait I get it, my business is the flight's business!! Is that how it goes?
/sigh.
I was hurt that, despite specifically asking this person not to say anything, he said something. I know who it was because at that point only two people knew and one was my supervisor.
Looks like my plan of action is to only let my supervisor know what is going on.
Anyways on to something else....
I am getting my butt whopped in Words with Friends. I am I am playing my aunt Gail and in the last few game the scores have been like 388-123.
Right now, the scores are not too bad 112-94, 199-139 and 96-89.
We are starting a business, from home and I need pick a niche of items to sell. Charles is going to be selling boxing items that other places (shoes and stuff) do not carry.
The coach said that if you go on GoogleAdwords and use the keyword tool, you can find out how much traffic a certain niche gets. He said that over 2,000 hits is good, but you don't want to be too broad though.
/sigh I do not have a clue what I want to sell.
Oh. In six more months (2 cycles) I will be eligible for orders overseas... Whoop! Not that I think I will get them. It would be nice to get to see more places. I can't remember what is exactly on my list, but I know Mildenhall, United Kingdom and Kadena,Japan were both on my preference sheet this last time when the listing came out.
Well,I am pretty hungry, so I'm going to say goodbye for now.
<3 Love you all! <3
Saturday, March 17, 2012
Freaking out!
Really... I am freaking out! I think I could be pregnant. Charles and I were messing around and he came inside me. He was just a tips length in my vagina, but it's still possible.
I am scared.
As I said in a previous post, he is adamant about not getting pregnant until we get a second opinion.
I don't want him to think I got pregnant or lied about when I was ovulating. When we had sex I had not gotten around to setting it so that my LMP was 22 Feb 12.
According to my Pink pad App on my phone, with the adjusted dates 4 march puts me 3 days before ovulation. This is what my app is showing for ovulation.
*forehead slap* I know, I know! I'm such an idiot! I should have made sure!
/sigh
Looks like I am going to buy some pregnancy tests, but Oh my God !!!!
I'll keep ya'll updated: Aunt Flo should be here in T-4 days.
Signing out for now <3
Kirstin
Wednesday, March 14, 2012
I am trying to keep my promise to myself, and update every other day, but I found it rather difficult to write. Well, not the physical writing part but more of what the heck do I write?
So, here I sit listening to "Yearbook" by Hanson and staring at the blank page....
<15 minutes passes>
Okay I think I know what to write now!
Charles had been super strict about the six month wait to get pregnant again. He actually said he'd completely abstain from sex for the remainder of the five months, and the only condition to breaking that is if I make an appointment with Capt. Phillips and get a second opinion.... The ER doctor is the one who recommended that we wait six months, but others have told me that their OBGYNs said they could get pregnant after they have one complete cycle. /sigh
Guess that means that I need to get on that appointment. I know he's not bluffing.
I am going to call tomorrow to see if I can get an appointment/talk to Capt. Phillips.
Now that I have miscarried again, I am terrified it is going to take another three years and doctor intervention for me to get pregnant again.
In other news, we started this online class so we can start a business thing using "drop-shipping"... I'm not sure what we are going to sell yet though. We are going to start with one niche, and then I'm hoping to eventually have a couple of different niches. If this works out, we could be potentially pay of ALL of our debt in six months. That would be amazing!
I also want to put aside some more money for Soraya. She's not doing too bad, she gets $30 a month, and any extra cash I have in my wallet goes to her.
For the new baby (when I get knocked up again), I plan to do the same thing I did for Soraya.
$.50 for every day I am pregnant with him/her (roughly 266-270 days)
$1 for every day she is alive for first year
$30 a month for savings
$250 from the tax return
Yep, my little princess has quite a bit saved up and one day (probably when she's 18) we will give it to her and send her off to Europe or something. :)
Wow, so I guess I have babbled quite a bit tonight... LoL Think it's all the Hanson I am listening to.
Oh speaking of Hanson, I was in the shoppette before work about a month ago and I was talking to my troop Brandon Wessel, and the song "MMMbop" came on. Oh my gosh can you say blast from the past. I couldn't believe how long it has been since that song came out. I was in junior high school, and it was the first concert Chelie and I ever went to. The tour was called "Road to Albertane".
Okay, I think I have written enough random thoughts tonight. But before I go, I'd like to give a shout out and a huge "thank you" to my friend Brandy for giving me the cunning idea (nine months to life- get it I am a cop!!) for this blog.
And now I am heading up to bed.
<3 Good Night <3
So, here I sit listening to "Yearbook" by Hanson and staring at the blank page....
<15 minutes passes>
Okay I think I know what to write now!
Charles had been super strict about the six month wait to get pregnant again. He actually said he'd completely abstain from sex for the remainder of the five months, and the only condition to breaking that is if I make an appointment with Capt. Phillips and get a second opinion.... The ER doctor is the one who recommended that we wait six months, but others have told me that their OBGYNs said they could get pregnant after they have one complete cycle. /sigh
Guess that means that I need to get on that appointment. I know he's not bluffing.
I am going to call tomorrow to see if I can get an appointment/talk to Capt. Phillips.
Now that I have miscarried again, I am terrified it is going to take another three years and doctor intervention for me to get pregnant again.
In other news, we started this online class so we can start a business thing using "drop-shipping"... I'm not sure what we are going to sell yet though. We are going to start with one niche, and then I'm hoping to eventually have a couple of different niches. If this works out, we could be potentially pay of ALL of our debt in six months. That would be amazing!
I also want to put aside some more money for Soraya. She's not doing too bad, she gets $30 a month, and any extra cash I have in my wallet goes to her.
For the new baby (when I get knocked up again), I plan to do the same thing I did for Soraya.
$.50 for every day I am pregnant with him/her (roughly 266-270 days)
$1 for every day she is alive for first year
$30 a month for savings
$250 from the tax return
Yep, my little princess has quite a bit saved up and one day (probably when she's 18) we will give it to her and send her off to Europe or something. :)
Wow, so I guess I have babbled quite a bit tonight... LoL Think it's all the Hanson I am listening to.
Oh speaking of Hanson, I was in the shoppette before work about a month ago and I was talking to my troop Brandon Wessel, and the song "MMMbop" came on. Oh my gosh can you say blast from the past. I couldn't believe how long it has been since that song came out. I was in junior high school, and it was the first concert Chelie and I ever went to. The tour was called "Road to Albertane".
Okay, I think I have written enough random thoughts tonight. But before I go, I'd like to give a shout out and a huge "thank you" to my friend Brandy for giving me the cunning idea (nine months to life- get it I am a cop!!) for this blog.
And now I am heading up to bed.
<3 Good Night <3
Monday, March 12, 2012
So I know in the last few posts, have been me basically bitching about work and some of the people I work with. I realized that if I keep going like this, this blog will no longer be about our journey to parenthood for the second time. So for now on I am not going to mention work unless it pertains to me getting knocked up, that bitch Aunt Flo or anything in between. LoL
So what’s new…
Well Friday was probably the worst day of Soraya’s life. I took her to the doctors because she had been exposed to RSV on the 5th of March and her cough had been getting progressively worse. I was worried because she all the sudden developed a fever of 103.5 and was not acting like herself. Poor baby had to get her oxygen monitored via her little toes and she screamed. Then Dr. Kim looked in her ears. The right one was clear, but there was lots of gunk in the left one. So much, she could not get it clear to see if there was an infection in there. :( She said that she probably had an infection and that we would treat it with Amoxicilian for ten days. She listened to her heart and lungs and watched her breathing. Then she sent us to the VA hospital for a chest x-ray. It was terrible. I had to hold her down so they could take a picture of the front of her chest, and the side of her chest. It didn’t take too long but she was not a happy camper after. We went back to the pediatrician and they did the swap for RSV. Now I don’t know what I was expecting, or hoping for but man that was just freaking horrible. Basically what they did was one of the techs and I held Soraya down and the other stuck a q-tip looking thingy up her nose all the way to her sinuses. I felt so bad for her because when they sat her back up her nose started to bleed. /cry… The worst part is I have to take her back today or tomorrow, for a re-check with Dr. Kim.
Soraya’s fever has gone down and she’s starting to play more, which is good but I think she is still really mad at me because she will not just come to me. I pretty much had to corner her to give her a hug and kiss before work. It breaks my heart every single time. I am sure this is not the last time I am going to have to do something that she does not like.
In other news … We are almost done with our first post miscarriage cycle. Aunt Flo should rear her ugly face and take out the trash around the 21st of March. In fact, I think I ovulated this past week. I had lots of gooey EWCM around the 7th. And man did I want to baby dance, but we agreed to wait the recommended 6 months (although I don’t want to wait that long). It sucks and I hate it.
In other random news, I found my friend Ashley Bunch (from junior high) on Facebook tonight. I set her a message, but I feel like a creeper since I sent her the request to be friends, then the message. I didn't even know what to write so I was lame and wrote "Hi! I was thinking about you the other night, and wanted to see how you were doing?" .... So lame right? well then I realized that she might not recognize me by just my face/first name so I sent her a second message with my maiden name... still super lame right? I really miss her. I looked around her profile and found that her mom also has a FB page and I admit it I almost busted into tears when I saw the profile picture of her and Ashley. Sooooo many good memories of all the bad/crazy/wild things we did between 7th grade and 10th grade. Its been so long since we talked I just hope she is willing to be friends again. I mean, I know our falling out/drifting apart was my fault. I'm the one that broke the pact, not her.
Anyways... I rant way too much about everything except what this blog is for..lol
<3 Good Night<3
So what’s new…
Well Friday was probably the worst day of Soraya’s life. I took her to the doctors because she had been exposed to RSV on the 5th of March and her cough had been getting progressively worse. I was worried because she all the sudden developed a fever of 103.5 and was not acting like herself. Poor baby had to get her oxygen monitored via her little toes and she screamed. Then Dr. Kim looked in her ears. The right one was clear, but there was lots of gunk in the left one. So much, she could not get it clear to see if there was an infection in there. :( She said that she probably had an infection and that we would treat it with Amoxicilian for ten days. She listened to her heart and lungs and watched her breathing. Then she sent us to the VA hospital for a chest x-ray. It was terrible. I had to hold her down so they could take a picture of the front of her chest, and the side of her chest. It didn’t take too long but she was not a happy camper after. We went back to the pediatrician and they did the swap for RSV. Now I don’t know what I was expecting, or hoping for but man that was just freaking horrible. Basically what they did was one of the techs and I held Soraya down and the other stuck a q-tip looking thingy up her nose all the way to her sinuses. I felt so bad for her because when they sat her back up her nose started to bleed. /cry… The worst part is I have to take her back today or tomorrow, for a re-check with Dr. Kim.
Soraya’s fever has gone down and she’s starting to play more, which is good but I think she is still really mad at me because she will not just come to me. I pretty much had to corner her to give her a hug and kiss before work. It breaks my heart every single time. I am sure this is not the last time I am going to have to do something that she does not like.
In other news … We are almost done with our first post miscarriage cycle. Aunt Flo should rear her ugly face and take out the trash around the 21st of March. In fact, I think I ovulated this past week. I had lots of gooey EWCM around the 7th. And man did I want to baby dance, but we agreed to wait the recommended 6 months (although I don’t want to wait that long). It sucks and I hate it.
In other random news, I found my friend Ashley Bunch (from junior high) on Facebook tonight. I set her a message, but I feel like a creeper since I sent her the request to be friends, then the message. I didn't even know what to write so I was lame and wrote "Hi! I was thinking about you the other night, and wanted to see how you were doing?" .... So lame right? well then I realized that she might not recognize me by just my face/first name so I sent her a second message with my maiden name... still super lame right? I really miss her. I looked around her profile and found that her mom also has a FB page and I admit it I almost busted into tears when I saw the profile picture of her and Ashley. Sooooo many good memories of all the bad/crazy/wild things we did between 7th grade and 10th grade. Its been so long since we talked I just hope she is willing to be friends again. I mean, I know our falling out/drifting apart was my fault. I'm the one that broke the pact, not her.
Anyways... I rant way too much about everything except what this blog is for..lol
<3 Good Night<3
Thursday, March 1, 2012
Well that was interesting
So last night went pretty well.. I guess. Most people just ignored me. Go figure. I mean I guess that saying "if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all" applies to miscarriages.
I find it interesting that the only four people to talk to me, and ask me how I am doing are either unmarried/married with no kids and divorced. The flight chief looked at me several time but never said a single word to me until I asked to go down to the ECP. And even then, he was like I need you to do this, this and this by end of shift... Um yea, sure...
My supervisor, TSgt Costanzo has been awesome- the flight chief, not so much. He was going to make me come in on Sunday night. TSgt Costanzo pretty much told him "Fuck you, she's not coming in". I really appreciate that, because at that time I really didn't need/want to be at work. In fact, I felt like I was going to have a panic attack the second I stepped out the door.
TSgt Costanzo also told me something really interesting. He said that when he told the flight chief that I went down, said flight chief got pissed off. Now, who does that? I mean, he's acting like it was my fault. Sorry try again asshole. Why would I want to miscarry a baby we were TRYING for and WANTED? Really, that is just an asinine line of thought. I lost a lot of respect for him, and I am glad that he wasn't told exactly why I went down.
Oh and you know what his first, words to me where "Uh Daniels you know your up right?" Uh yea, I do, I kind of had to go see Captain Florence to get brought back up. Geez, maybe if you had looked at the roster you would have seen that I wasn't posted. An don't blame your Piss poor management of the flight, on us. Yes I went down, but I came back up and that's what's important to you- not my mental health right? Go fuck your self asshole. God help you if your wife ever has a miscarriage.
Anyways, I am going to end my rants here. <3 Goodnight <3
I find it interesting that the only four people to talk to me, and ask me how I am doing are either unmarried/married with no kids and divorced. The flight chief looked at me several time but never said a single word to me until I asked to go down to the ECP. And even then, he was like I need you to do this, this and this by end of shift... Um yea, sure...
My supervisor, TSgt Costanzo has been awesome- the flight chief, not so much. He was going to make me come in on Sunday night. TSgt Costanzo pretty much told him "Fuck you, she's not coming in". I really appreciate that, because at that time I really didn't need/want to be at work. In fact, I felt like I was going to have a panic attack the second I stepped out the door.
TSgt Costanzo also told me something really interesting. He said that when he told the flight chief that I went down, said flight chief got pissed off. Now, who does that? I mean, he's acting like it was my fault. Sorry try again asshole. Why would I want to miscarry a baby we were TRYING for and WANTED? Really, that is just an asinine line of thought. I lost a lot of respect for him, and I am glad that he wasn't told exactly why I went down.
Oh and you know what his first, words to me where "Uh Daniels you know your up right?" Uh yea, I do, I kind of had to go see Captain Florence to get brought back up. Geez, maybe if you had looked at the roster you would have seen that I wasn't posted. An don't blame your Piss poor management of the flight, on us. Yes I went down, but I came back up and that's what's important to you- not my mental health right? Go fuck your self asshole. God help you if your wife ever has a miscarriage.
Anyways, I am going to end my rants here. <3 Goodnight <3
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